It's that time again....

I have an article due in 2 weeks. It's a homeschooling magazine high school column, and I've been writing it for about a year and a half now. Sometimes I think I'm running out of specific things to say to parents who are homeschooling their teens, and sometimes I think the possibilities are endless.

For many years people have asked me to explain how my kids learn to write so well. Recently, these questions have increased, probably due to the fact that in the last few months my 17yo dd, Deedee, first won a Scholastic Young Artists and Writers National Gold Medal for a play she wrote about children in the Holocaust, and then she won the California History Day top award for her paper on the White Rose group (WWII anti-Nazi German college students).

Moms want to know how I "get" my kids to write. And how they learn to write the *way* they write.

So I should probably do an article on this topic. I think there is plenty of interest. The only problem is that I don't have some "magic" curriculum to recommend. My kids write as they do (and thrive on writing!) because they have grown up feasting on great books. They have eagerly tried to create their own interesting characters and plots since they were very young, and they love researching and then passing on to others the many intriguing stories they come across in their study of history.

So how to communicate this "method" to other parents? Is it actually a topic I can analyze and demonstrate in a way that is accessible and helpful to others without making them feel discouraged? Will people be open to the idea of approaching writing in a natural way? That's what I have to figure out... and soon.

Kim

Tuesday, May 6th, 2008 -- Freedom Academy

I'll call yesterday Day #1 in my project of describing a "normal" week in our busy homeschooling family. Please remember that what I say here works for my family very well, but I can't promise you that it will be perfect for your family, too. Sort of like those medical or legal disclaimers that come at the end of all the ads, eh? ;-o No, it's not that bad... ! I do stand by our relaxed philosophy and methodology. I firmly believe that how we handle our daily living and learning can work for many other homeschool families as well, if they approach things with the right attitude.

Have you noticed that our lives -- not just the results, but also the experiences along the way -- are greatly affected by the way we think and behave? I have seen a direct link between my perspective and what happens each day... between my perspective and how others react to me... between my perspective and how my kids treat each other. Wow -- that realization throughout the years has caused me to guard against being too uptight or set in my ways. Maintaining the eternal and compassionate perspective I should have has also forced me to reevaluate my priorities regularly. So what we're doing this month might evolve into something quite different by next month in order to better emphasize whatever God wants us to learn at that time.

Ok, enough preface already. On with the show.

Mornings at our house:

Yesterday morning was much like any other weekday morning. The older three girls get up between 6:30 and 7 am to get ready for their days, and the three middle kids usually wake up about 7 am to get their own breakfast and do their chores. Sometimes an older girl will sleep in until the last minute (7:30 am), and I have to hustle her out of bed, but not normally... and not yesterday. Often one or both of the boys will get up early (even 5:00 am!) to play their educational "Civilization" computer game before breakfast and chore time. Yesterday, Ben did this and enjoyed the quiet time to himself.

Audrey's crib is in my room, so she wakes me up every morning around 6:30 am. (My husband is often gone before this time -- either running or to an early prayer meeting or to work.) After changing and dressing Audrey for the day, I start an educational DVD for her (an animal one from the San Diego Zoo or a Musical one w/ great classical music and counting and such). The TV is in my room, so Audrey remains in her crib during this time. My 4yo Megan usually joins Audrey within a few moments. They much on cheese sticks and bananas while I get ready for the day. I start coffee and read my Bible a little.

At 7:4o am, I leave to take Caiti to her job at a law office in town and drop Deedee and Shannon for their morning music, art, and Advanced Math classes at the community college that is just 1 mile from our home. While I'm gone, Ben, Ellie Rose, and Jim finish their chores. Megan and Audrey either come with me or finish their movie, as I am only gone about 20 minutes.

Since this is the way things go every weekday morning, I won't repeat the description every day. You can just assume all went as usual unless I mention something otherwise. ;-) I will say that until the last couple of years, I did **not** get up and moving this early. I mean, babies and toddlers always have you up early, but that doesn't mean you're necessarily functioning in any real way! ;-) But I do admit that the early start has been a positive change overall. I think I will continue with it even if the need to be out the door fades. I just seem to have a more energetic attitude towards the day when I start it this way -- which actually is a big surprise to me as I have never considered myself a "morning" person at all.

So after I returned home yesterday morning, I took my two little girls outside, and they ran around while I transplanted tomatoes and such. The middle kids (that's how I refer to Ben, Ellie Rose, and Jim-Bob in shorthand) were in the dining room and kitchen with the windows open, facing the front yard, so we could talk back and forth when necessary. They did some free reading, and thenJim worked on a story he's been writing, Ellie Rose copied some poetry and did some music theory on the computer, and Ben finished up some map work (he was actually studying the major roads in the U.S. at the time of the War of 1812). After a while, Jim came out to join me and helped me with the gardening, while Ellie Rose and Ben practiced their instruments (flute and clarinet).

At lunchtime, some friends delivered two cute Birman kitties to us, and the kids played with them while I threw together some sandwiches and fruit. My aunt arrived with her boys (13 and almost 15), and I ran over (well, drove) to the college to pick up the girls. Back home, I put Audrey down for her nap and settled Megan with some puzzles and art supplies and her little dollies and cars and such in the front room. Ellie Rose and Jim and their 13yo cousin went outside to play, while Ben and his older cousin and I sat down in the dining room to tackle algebra for an hour and a half. My two older girls would usually go off to their rooms at this point to work on their own academics and reading and art and such -- they are almost completely independent learners. However, Shannon was distracted by the kitties and took them to her room to cuddle, and Deedee went outside to help Jim paint his Awana Grand Prix car -- he wanted it to look just like a giraffe. ;-)

After Algebra, the boys played "Civilization" for 20 minutes or so (since Ben can't play outside at the moment due to the fact that he cut his hand with the saw a few days ago, and I don't want him getting it dirty....). After their break, the older boys called in the others, and we did our weekly unit study in American History. We are, as mentioned above, currently at the War of 1812 and finding it all very interesting. The kids shared their artwork and stories and maps and such, and then we discussed Tecumseh and W.H. Harrison and Napoleon and the British and Washington D.C. burning and generally had a great time. During this time, Shannon was playing outside with Audrey and Megan, and Deedee had been picked up by a friend to go back to the college for a choir practice.

4 pm! Plans for a Pampered Chef party for last night fell through when the hostess called to say the "party lady" had a family medical emergency, so the show was cancelled. My aunt arrived to pick up her boys, and I watered the liquid amber trees as the kids rode bikes and/or played with the kitties. At 4:30 pm, I went over to the college and grabbed Deedee and her best friend, dropped them at home so they could make some quick burritos, and then went to pick up Caiti from her job. I had Megan and Audrey, of course, and they enjoy running these late afternoon chauffeur trips with me. I bring them a snack, and we listen to K-Love (a Christian music radio station), and we usually stop and get a raspberry tea or an Italian soda somewhere along the route...

When I dropped Caiti at home, I asked her to put some water on to boil, and I took Shannon to her ballet class and Deedee and her friend to their Orchestra Dress Rehearsal for this weekend's performance.... Then I brought the little girls home and made some spaghetti. It was about 6:15 pm at that point...

Ok, I'll have to update the rest of this later when I have a little more time. ;-)


Blessings,

Kim

Where does the time go?

As the cliche says, "Time flies!"

Wow, it's hard to believe it's been more than two weeks since I last wrote here. I think the gap in writing on my blog (the same gap I see on other blogs) stems from two main issues.

First, I think we bloggers (writers though we are...) occasionally feel we have nothing important to say, nothing worthy of a reader's time and attention, nothing profound or life-changing to pass on to others.

I struggle with this "dilemma" at times, and I have to remind myself that people come to blogs like these for various reasons. To share in the joy or sorrow of the day-to-day happenings of others' lives, to glean experienced advice, to soak in a fresh perspective or approach to challenges, to make new friends -- these are all common reasons people frequent blogs.

However, I doubt many of us read people's personal thoughts and ramblings expecting to discover something deep and meaningful that will alter the course of our existence. Of course, it might happen, but I don't think anyone is planning on it. So why let ourselves feel pressure to "perform" in any certain way? Why worry that some anonymous reader out there is going to view our writing as trivial and pointless? Uuuuhhhh..... so what? ;-)

Secondly, I think we are all simply busy!

I know my own life is crammed full. I'm chasing my toddler, grocery shopping... again ("Mom, there's nothing to eat!"), reminding my teens of various important deadlines, working just a little in the garden, updating my Netflix queue with appropriate history DVDs, helping the kids with their math (carrying, borrowing, making change, deciphering Roman numerals, reducing fractions, and conquering algebra... by the way, I now know the answer to "Where am I ever going to use all this math?"), planning a craft-filled American Girl party for my 10yo dd (even though I am soooo not-crafty!), reading aloud the new Mysterious Benedict Society book, baking lots of cookies, matching lots of socks (and wondering how I always end up with 87 singles in search of mates), staying up late into the night with my older kids to discuss the genocide going on in Darfur and the upcoming U.S. elections, meeting at B&N with a mom who wants to talk about pulling her kids out of public school, looking at my "mending basket" momentarily before deciding it can wait (another few years...), starting to teach a Sunday School class, buying plane tickets to NYC (for my 17yo's national award ceremony), arranging for my son to come home from college for the summer, drawing hopscotch squares in the driveway and then demonstrating my expertise, finishing just a couple more pages in my scrapbook, cheering at the Awana Grand Prix (and taking pictures of all their amazingly designed cars), reading a whole book just for me, writing (articles, letters, plays, online groups), and -- of course -- the biggest thing of all, chauffeuring!!!

So, I'm busy. Which sometimes causes me to forget about this blog of mine that's just sitting here waiting for me to come write.

Don't misunderstand me though. I'm not complaining about being busy. I love my life. Truthfully, I consider it to be a simple one. I don't feel rushed (except very occasionally); I don't feel frantic; I don't feel exhausted. Instead, I usually feel satisfied, happy, even exhilarated. I used to wonder why my busy life makes me feel this way, despite the fact that I am actually a quiet type who prefers solitude much of the time. In contrast, many people I know seem overwhelmed with what they call the "craziness" of their lives. So I really thought and prayed about it.

What I finally realized is that my life energizes me and makes me feel content (though still challenged) because we are doing the things that we have decided are truly important to us. These are not the same things that would be important and fulfilling to every family, but they are what God has specifically laid on our hearts to make priorities in our lives at this time. Since I am sure that what we are doing is what is best for us right now, I have no need to worry or second-guess. I can **relax** and enjoy our time with each other as we move through our busy days.

Again, I have nothing profound to say here, and I know you are just as busy as I am. If you have actually read all the way through this long-winded writing, I thank you for your time.

I pray that you and your family are fully enjoying whatever it is that God has given you to do this day.

Rush on -- and relax! ;-)

Kim

Surviving the Interview...

Well, Deedee's interview went great. She did an excellent job -- just her usual confident and enthusiastic self! I'm so proud of her, and I'm so glad we've had the privilege and fun of homeschooling.

My kids would not be who they are today if they had not had the time and freedom that homeschooling has provided them through the years. They've had the ongoing opportunity to explore their interests deeply..... not to mention how homeschooling has helped them feel comfortable with being weird. And being weird is definitely a good thing in this world. It teaches you to stand up for what you believe even when no one seems to agree with you.

Blessings,

Kim

Stanford... or... Yale??? Yale... or... Stanford???

And with just five days to spare before the FINAL, FINAL, FINAL deadline....

Caiti... finally... chose........


*

*

*

*

*

*

*


STANFORD!



She had us all fooled though. We thought for sure she was going to pick Yale, and then she surprised us completely and chose Stanford.

Yeah! Just slightly closer to home... ;-)

(Only 4 1/2 hrs. drive.)

So she's 20 years old (well, 21 in July), and she heads off for her own apartment and a 5-yr. Ph.D. program in modern British history in mid-September. All her costs (tuition, study abroad, etc.) are covered -- plus, she gets a huge yearly stipend. God has blessed her so richly. And she is very relieved to have the big decision over now. ;-)

We are, too. One down, eight to go....


Kim

Also coming in June...

Right after Deedee and I get back from NYC, Shannon and Ellie Rose have their full week of daily rehearsals leading into the big Dance Performance weekend. They are doing "The Red Shoes" ballet, and Shannon has two big roles.

The day after the Dance Performances, we leave on a 3 1/2 week cross-country road trip. We'll be seeing relatives and friends, but mostly we'll be visiting a lot of historical sites. Washington DC, Mt. Vernon, Monticello, Williamsburg, Jamestown, and Roanoke, plus the Grand Canyon, and more... I'll post details about the trip as I get it planned. Note to self: plan the trip. (If you have any ideas, please feel free to pass them along to me. I welcome tips of all kinds.)

Caiti, Deedee, and Paul will be staying behind at home. For one thing, they all have jobs. For another thing, they wouldn't fit in the minivan! ;-) We'll be full to the brim with dh, 6 kids, and me.

Speaking of Caiti, I have some long-awaited news about her........

in my next entry! ;-)

Kim

Big News #1 .........

Deedee and I will be going to New York City for a week in early June because....

Deedee won a huge award!

In January she entered a play in Scholastic's National Art & Writing Competition. There were over 100,000 original entries, and 10,000 earned Regional awards (8,000 works of art and 2,000 manuscripts). Deedee's play won a Regional Gold Key award and moved on to National judging. Then this past weekend we learned that her play has actually won the highest award possible at the National level! (Only 600 works of art and 320 manuscripts won any kind of national award.)

So Deedee will now be receiving a Gold Medal at Carnegie Hall, enjoying workshops with accomplished writers and artists, and touring places like NBC, the Metropolitan Museum of Art, and Scholastic Publishing. She'll also have opportunities for publication of her play. While in NYC, she and I intend to do some sightseeing, of course, as well as take in a Broadway play.

This coming week, our local newspaper is doing an interview with Deedee (and me) because they want to do a big "Profile" story on her. They think she sounds very interesting. They don't know the half of it! ;-) She's a bit nervous about being a representative for homeschoolers (especially with all that's gone down in California lately in regards to homeschooling), and her best friend didn't help matters any. She and her family have been interviewed several times over the years because her mom heads up our county's homeschool network group, and she told Deedee not to worry because the reporters will always take the stupidest thing you say and publish it front and center! Or just misquote you! Yikes! But we want to do our part to educate people -- they need to learn that homeschooling does work and really does turn out great kids with a passion and purpose for making a difference in this world.

Of course, her younger brother Ben (almost 13) put things into perspective quite nicely.

Ben: "I don't think Deedee's that interesting."

Mom: "Ben, you don't mean that!"

Ben: "Well, 'interesting' isn't the right word. She's just really busy."

And so we are. ;-)


Kim

Designing Our Own Studies vs. "Canned Curriculums"

Someone recently asked a question on a homeschooling forum I frequent. I think I will post my answer here, too, as it is a key factor in the way I approach homeschooling.... This homeschool mom asked if anyone strayed from the "canned curriculums" -- the "boxed" sets of texts, workbooks, quizzes, and tests. She wanted to know if anyone actually designed their own studies for their children.

In truth, I believe many of us handle homeschooling this way. Being eclectic isn't only the fashionably "in-thing" -- it's also very wise. After all, our children are individuals with vastly different interests, strengths, and weaknesses.... how could "one way" work best for all of them?

I started creating my own stuff when the original "texts" I ordered for my then 4yo oldest daughter (17 years ago) turned out to be a bunch of boring busywork! So we've never used any textbooks for math, science, grammar. etc... The kids just learn these things through real books and writing, and I make up fun math worksheets for them until they hit the high school level.

Nowadays there is so much available online and so many great lit-based studies and such a wide variety in teaching approaches to science and math, etc., that I can imagine it might be overwhelming to a new homeschooler. My recommendation is that parents expose their kids to a huge amount of exciting info when they are younger and then follow their specific interests more deeply as they grow older.

By the way, choosing your own material selectively and planning your own studies according to your timetable is NOT the lazy way out that I have sometimes heard it called. My kids are definitely self-disciplined and self-motivated and have real goals in life and know what they must do to reach those goals. A "complete curriculum" that covers "all the bases" is not the only way one can learn diligence and responsibility. We have found plenty of methods for teaching those skills as well, but we like to keep the joy of curiosity and the passion for learning alive and well in our kids. We have found that designing our kids' studies based on their individuality is an excellent way to accomplish this purpose.


Blessings,

Kim

But what about socialization???

Some new homeschoolers worry about the whole "socialization" question. Us old-timers just tend to roll our eyes when that question comes along -- please, forgive us, but you'll be there, too, one day! ;-)

I say, if your kids are young, (11, 12, or less), relax. There will be plenty of time for friends later. My goal has always been for my children to be each other's best friends anyway -- and it *is* possible! ;-)

My oldest kids (due to financial constraints at the time and only one car) were not involved in anything outside of church and Awana for years. Didn't hurt them a bit. As a matter of fact, I think it's much better for them at that young age. Gives them more time to spend with me and each other, on their academics, having fun with board games, reading great books, playing outside, doing art projects, etc. -- less time to grow concerned with what other kids are wearing (expensive name-brands or immodest clothing), playing (X-box, etc.), or watching (TV, movies...) and more time to soak up our family's values and the Scriptural training we are giving them.

There are so many cheap or inexpensive things you can do. When my kids were very young, (7 and down), and we lived in a pretty "bad" neighborhood in upstate NY, (w/ lots of children home alone until late at night), I organized an afternoon "read-aloud time" for all the kids in the neighborhood. Usually about 20 kids came each day to gather on our covered front porch to hear me read from the "Little House" books. I passed out homemade cookies, and sometimes we sang songs afterwards, and then the kids rode bikes together as I watched for a short time. (I would *not* have left them unsupervised!) But those kids were desperate for attention, and my kids saw how blessed they were.

Some of the free or inexpensive things we have done over the years for both younger and older kids have been: homeschool choir, nature walks w/ the homeschool group, weekly Park Day and/or Sing-Alongs w/ homeschool group, organized field trips (to Civil War reenactments, the local ice cream store, the Shasta Dam or caverns, etc...), monthly homeschool skate days, community symphonic band and the youth orchestra, a teen writing club, a chess club, drama class/performances, Civil Air Patrol, Scottish dancing (only $5 a class), arts and crafts classes at the local Michaels store, B&N Story Hour (twice a week for various ages -- my then 3yo loved getting her picture taken with Clifford!), and so much more.

Really, the opportunity for positive socialization is all around us. Learning to get along and to make friends with people of all ages and backgrounds happens much more easily in the homeschool setting than it ever could in the formal, age-segregated, institutional school environment. My children have been best socialized in many ways by the residents at one of our local nursing homes where we went for over 8 years every week to visit, play music, sing, play board games, tap dance, and listen to their stories. ;-)

If there is nothing going on in your area, start something. (Yes, even if "starting things" is not your usual mode of operation -- be brave!) Start an online support group for local homeschoolers. Encourage other moms to organize actvities. Organize some regular activities yourself. Better yet, let your kids brainstorm some ideas and start some activities. At different times, my kids started our local chess club, a teen writing club, Bible studies with their friends, a science experiment class, and more. I began teaching drama to our local homeschool kids about 6 years ago, and it's been a fun way for these kids to really know each other and "grow up" together over the years.

One thing I've noticed is that kids tend to "socialize" (as in, talk, play, make friends) a lot more before or after the official activity, so try not to be the ones who arrive late and rush off right as it ends. Every week before drama or choir or whatever, the kids run up to each other and start sharing what they've been doing with each other excitedly.... and then afterwards, they never fail to start a pickup game of touch football or act out a castle-and-knights story or teach other to play the group jumprope rhymes -- actually, us old-time mommas have to "jump" in and show them how it's done....!

What touches my heart the most is the way the older kids (17, 18 years old...) play with the younger kids (down to 5 or 6 years old). Last week after drama, I looked around my big yard and saw a game of touch football that included several high school boys along with a few 4th/5th grade girls, and a bunch of young 5 to 8 yo boys. They were all having a blast together. It wasn't just the older boys indulging the younger kids -- they were all truly enjoying having fun together. ;-)

Then in the sideyard some high school girls were giving advice to a group of rambunctious kids who were playing "King of the Mountain" and others who were climbing trees, but they were also playing with a 4yo boy w/ CP, helping him pick flowers and bring them to his mom and making him laugh. There was no sense of anything forced or awkward about any of this, and nothing was scripted. These kids just expect to have fun playing with all age levels and all different types of people.

I like that.

Once again, I am so glad I have the privilege of homeschooling my kids! ;-)


Blessings,

Kim

Relaxing in Our Homeschooling

I think I have it easy. I was born not really caring what other people think of me! ;-)

My kids and I have a great time together following their passions and not feeling compelled to meet any particular group's expectations or requirements. It is simply freeing to live life without worrying about what others are doing and how you and your kids measure up to them. Instead, we can concentrate on what God has placed in our hearts and prioritize the things He wants us to put first -- and those are different things for every family, of course.

We need to realize that our children will learn what they need to know when they need to know it. Meanwhile, life can be interesting and exhilarating and a lot less stressful.

Sometimes my friends wonder how I can have so many kids and manage all of our activities and still give each child one-on-one attention and help them excel in music or academics or whatever -- and yet not be completely frantic and overwhelmed! I try to explain that my life is easy. I'm not trying to oversee "x" number of math and spelling workbook pages every day in 6 different grade levels. I'm not giving and keeping track of quizzes and grades and busywork assignments. I'm not wondering whether one of the kids is "behind" in a certain subject.

We just get up each day, eager to learn more, ready for reading and making music and watercolor painting and writing stories and acting and building forts and baking yummy brownies and designing jewlery and sewing costumes and doing crazy science experiments and having political debates and conquering algebra and reading some more and dissecting fish and dancing with the toddler and running off to all our activities and cheering each other on and sending silly notes back and forth and enjoying coffee dates at B&N and other fun stuff like that.

I almost feel guilty when I see others so consumed by textbook/workbook constraints and pressures. (I'm not talking about the moms who like those approaches, but the ones who feel restricted by them and yet obligated to them.) I just want to tell them, "Let it go, let it all go. Enjoy your kids. Enjoy learning each day, and focus on your relationships." But that all sounds so condescending.

I remind myself to keep my opinions quiet most of the time, and I try to phrase things as gently as possible when asked directly. Everyone wants to help their children develop to their fullest potential, and none of us is in and of ourselves better than anyone else. Often, there is a lot we can learn from other homeschool moms even when our approach to homeschooling is very different.

I know that though we have always practiced an eclectic, laid-back, interest-driven style of homeschooling, there are still things that have evolved over the years. Though I have always been confident, there are many ways I am even more relaxed now than I was in the past. My kids taught me as we went along through the years what worked best and what was unnecessary. I just paid close attention and adjusted accordingly. ;-)

I only wish everyone could experience the joy and peace that relaxed homeschooling has brought to our family, and I'm so grateful that God led us this way so many years ago.

Blessings,
Kim